In Real Life (IRL) Men's Groups

My good friend and colleague Brian Thompson, LMFT, CGP and I lead seven ongoing groups that take place either online, in-person (Berkeley), or a combination of both.  Brian and I have personally and professionally experienced the unique power of working in groups, and are responding to the need for places that support the emotional development of men. Brian and I are both Certified Group Psychotherapists (CGP) through the American Group Psychotherapy Association.

Our groups benefit male-identified people who want to improve their communication skills, strengthen their relationships, and work through the blocks that keep them from thriving in their lives.  We look for members who are committed to long-term (3-10 years) depth work and who can attend consistently. Groups are 90 minutes long and take place weekly.

If you are interested in joining the group, please contact me here to set up a free phone consultation.  Visit our website for more information about IRL Men at www.IRLMen.com. 

Fees and Insurance

Our fee for groups ranges from $100-160 per 90-minute session (depending if you are joining a group that includes the annual retreat or not). We also require that any person interested in potentially joining a group complete an intake process, which involves four intake sessions. Each group has 1-2 spaces for sliding scale participants, so please inquire if the full fee would be prohibitive for you.

Although we do not take insurance as in-network providers, we are able to offer a superbill, which contains the information needed to submit an out-of-network claim with your insurance company. Most insurance plans offer out-of-network coverage; you will need to check with your individual plan to find out how much they are able to cover.  

Our In-Person Berkeley Groups take place at :

3120 Telegraph Ave. Suite 3A

Berkeley, CA  94705

Why join a Men’s Group?

As a mentor of mine says, “when we’re wounded in group, we need to heal in group.” Many of us carry wounds from our original group, our families.

Others have been wounded by peer groups, school yard bullying, or by painful romantic relationships or even workplace dynamics.

When this is the case, group therapy can be a more effective space for working through these relational wounds than individual therapy or medication.

The reason for this is that groups have the unique ability to stir up the old feelings and conflicts, but provide a safe space to explore, understand, and heal in the company of other men.

Part of what makes healing in group so powerful is what’s called the “corrective emotional experience.”

In other words, we get to be in a space that might look and feel similar as the one that hurt us, but in this case, there is deep trust built between group members that allows the hurt to feel seen and held rather than dismissed or denied.

Sometimes, it’s important to work through these feelings and patterns in the company of men and women, but there are some specific reasons why a men’s group can be more helpful than a co-ed group.

There are some experiences specific to being male-acculturated that can be helpful for everyone in the room to relate to, such as internalized homophobia, being socialized to solve problems, and a general message that vulnerability is not welcome.

It can be helpful to have a safe space to talk through some of the things that are core to being male-bodied in this society, including many of the ways that men are often taught to be cut off from their emotional life.

Visit our website for more information about IRL Men at www.IRLMen.com. 

Want to know what group looks, sounds, and feels like?

Check out this awesome YouTube series called “Group.” In it, you’ll watch a highly skilled real-life group therapist Elliot Zeizel, PhD work with a group of actors who have been given character backgrounds, but are doing an improv of a therapy group. In it, you’ll see them navigate everything from sex to jealousy to abandonment to sadism. It’s a wild ride, we highly recommend watching the full first season, which you can find here!

Interested but not sure you’re ready for the leap yet?

We know it can be a big investment to join a long-term group! We are invested in making sure you have all the information you need to decide if one of our groups is right for you.

Give us a shout, we’d love to answer any of your questions about men’s group!